The Resolution

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At the end of the day, there is only one resolution I need to keep.

Yesterday morning, I sat in the cramped dining room of my grandmother’s home with my cousins, Sam and JP.  We ate fried spam, vienna sausages, and eggs, sunny-side up on paper plates with flowers printed on the edges.

It didn’t feel like the last day of 2013 until they started talking about New Year’s Resolutions.

Sam, the older sibling, a little girl with long, dark hair, and a shy smile said that she wasn’t making any resolutions.

“Nobody ever keeps their resolutions, anyways,” she said.  She laughed.

“My New Year’s resolution is to help people come up with their resolution,” said JP, younger with the same dark hair and big eyes.

The two are no more than 10 years old.  When I was that age, I think I was coming up with resolutions to do better in school or maybe to eat less candy that year.  I don’t think I ever thought that I’d fail in my resolutions and I never thought of not making one because others failed in keeping their resolutions.

“What is your New Year’s resolution, Ate?” they asked, using the Filipino term of respect meaning “older sister.”

I laughed, spitting out some egg yolk.  They had just told me that they weren’t making any resolutions, but they expected me to make some and to keep them.

The last few years, I have made similar resolutions: to work harder in school, to spend more time with family friends, to exercise more, and to read more or do more things other than spend time on the computer.  I’ve never really kept track of them because I’ve been too busy with school and now that I’m out of school, these are things that I am constantly trying to get better at.

So what’s my resolution?  I told my little cousins that I wanted to apply to grad school.  I don’t know if that’s a real resolution.  But I think the last New Year’s Resolution I need to make is to try and be the best version of myself everyday.  To me, this means exercising as much as I can, being good person to my family and friends, eating yummy food, etc.

And, if I’m trying to be my best everyday, it means that every morning is a new chance to be better.  Life doesn’t renew itself once a year – it happens day by day.

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